H 02 A Dragon's Retorte
Claire Stephens 1985
Sung To The Tune Of Irish Washerwoman
Hear, now I am a dragon please listen to me
For I'm misunderstood to a dreadful degree.
This ecology needs me and I know my place,
But I'm fighting extinction with all of my race.
Now I came to this village to better my health
Which is shockingly poor despite all of my wealth
But I get no assistance and no sympathy:
Just impertinent questioning shouted at me.
Yes, virgins taste sweeter than those who are not
But my favorite snack food with peril is fraught
For my teeth will decay and my trim go to pot.
[Yet, virgins taste better than those who are not]
Well, we worms are deep thinkers; at science we shine,
But our world's complicated with every new line:
We must quit all the things that we've done since the Flood
Like, lying on gold couches poisons our blood!
Now I'm really quite good almost all of the year;
Vegetarian ways are now mine out of fear.
But a birthday needs sweets as I'm sure you'll agree,
And barbecued wench tastes like candy to me
As it happens, our interests are almost the same
For I'm really quite skillful at managing game.
If I messed with your men, would your excess decline?
Of course not, the rest would just make better time
But the number of babies a woman can bear
Has a limit, and that's why my pruning 's done there.
Yet an orphan's a sad sight, and so when I munch
I'm careful to take out only virgins for lunch.
Words by Claire Stephens, (C)1987 or whenever the Barbequed Songbook came out.
Permission is granted for publication in Star OKC's Galactic Gazette, and to make single copies for personal use, but not for publication or profit.
Based on the song, "Do Virgins Taste Better..." by Randy Farran.
Designed to be sung to "The Irish Washerwoman"
(I would like to thank Claire Stephens for granting me permission to post this song both here as well print it in the Non-profit Avacal Bards Book - K)
(Note: Post updating the music title will follow shortly)